My Daughter is watching Tangled and she and I have worked through the Narcissist Formula.
I broke it down with her in 3 Tools that the Narcissist uses:
- Compromise and Remove “The Equal Footing”
- Disguise the Sting to Preserve the Narcissist Enslavement
- Attack Self-Doubt
The results? The Descent into Narcissist Enslavement that can and does last long after the Narcissist is gone.
The First Tool
All Narcissists begin with Compromising The Equal Footing. This is done in 2 ways:
- Put down the Opponent/Victim
- Put down the Self
- Boost up the Self
- Over Compliment the Opponent/Victim
This leads to the Opponent/Victim feeling the need to “Save The Narcissist” by then Complimenting the Narcissist or putting themselves down.
To better see how this works, watch this lesson:
Protected: Human Circuitry: The Vantage Condition Scale (Power As Currency)
The Second Tool
The Second Stage of Narcissist Enslavement is “Disguise With Honey.” This is when you see a Narcissist Insult then Sweeten. It’s like adding a Poison that you then disguise with a strong sweetener to ensure the Poison goes undetected.
We see this a lot in Tangled. That is like… every word the Mother says to Rapunzel. Insult then Sweet. Insult then laugh. Insult then Dismiss with “Just Joking.”
The Red Herring or Distract and Disguise is how Narcissists hide their Attack on The Equal Footing. It is very competative. Very hierarchial in Thinking.
The Third Tool
The Third Stage of Narcissist Enslavement is Attack the Opponent’s Self-Doubt. This PRESERVES the Compromised Equal Footing that the Narcissist has worked hard to obtain and disguise.
The attacked Self-Doubt is what leaves the Victim Divided.
For many of us, it is this Three Stage Process that we are all recovering from.
Loss of Control
The Narcissist uses the “Compromised Equal Footing” to Secure their Delusion of Control. The thing is, True Control is only obtained through The Power of Choice + Self-Authority + Confidence to Manage Consequences.
The Narcissists seeks Control via Manipulation instead of The Power of Choice, and thus, what the Narcissists ends up with instead os The Delusion of Control instead of True Control.
When the Narcissist realized they have or are losing Control, it is common to see The Narcissists Panic Stage.
The Panic Stage is much different (and very dangerous) than your average Panic.
The Narcissist (depending on their Level of Narcissism), can become much like a trapped, rabid dog for it is their Delusion of Control that Ensures their Safety.
They do this because they think, they feel, that in order to have Love, they must lure, trap, and manipulate people into loving them. But they are also so terrified of love and vulnerability that they turn to the Delusion of Control to preserve their “love.”
Couple this with the Three Stages of Narcissism and you can see the full Perspective of Narcissism and thus, protect yourself from it.
The Stages of Narcissism
The Circle of Trust is an excellent tool for keeping you safe while assessing a person’s Safety Level.
The Circle of Trust
